Talk is cheap...

Talk is cheap...so cheap in fact, you can usually get it for free.  There is a reason why it is often so cheap, because it doesn't take any effort to talk.  Follow-through is probably one of the most important things we can do, but so often it is the one thing that is really lacking.  Take a simple "supply and demand" curve: there is a lot of "talk" out there and thus the very affordable cost.  "Follow through" on the other hand is in low supply and always asked for in high quantity.  


Think of all the people who want you to follow through on all of your "talk"...teachers, parents, kids, family, spouse, boss, employees, and the list could go on.  You can go on constantly talking about how great you are, but at some point you will run into someone who will want you to show some validity to the "you're awesome" argument.  At some point, you have to show your child how much you love them and care about them by showing up to a sporting event or something similar; without it being a battle between choosing your child over your own "important" schedule.  


Sometimes, I don't even think it's about following through with promises you make to others, or proving how awesome you are.  I think one of the biggest issues is our own viewpoint on life as a whole.  How many times have we talked about spending more time with our family?...or eating healthier?  We talk about these grand plans that we have for our lives and all the things we want to do (realistic or not) but a majority of the time we never follow through.  Why?


Life happens.  Our dream of traveling to Italy slowly gets piled on deeper and deeper with bills and other pads of note paper.  Our gym membership sits on the coffee table in the living room, gathering as much dust as our Bible we said we were going to start reading more often.  Our priorities change.  There's nothing wrong with that by any means.  But, by constantly holding on to some dream (and worse) continuing to talk about it like it's going to happen only attacks our soul and makes us feel worthless, negative and regretful.  Those feelings certainly don't make me feel like doing ANYTHING.  My advice is to STOP talking about all the stuff we say we are going to do.  If you want to do something, then go and do it; talk about it afterward.  Stop telling yourself you are going to do something when you know you really aren't; stop pretending to be someone to other people by making these grand plans and not being able to follow through...chances are they will love you regardless.  


Don't misunderstand me, having dreams and pursuing them is a great thing!  I'm talking about putting on a mask and pretending to be someone you're not to impress yourself, your family, your boss or just other people in general.  Maybe, just maybe, if we get rid of all the Fairy Tale-pretend-garbage, then we might get to know each other better, because we'll start being honest with one another for the first time.  


Matthew 6 


Listening to...Making me a believer - TFK

Perspective

Perspective is a crazy thing.  In some ways it's kind of like common sense, in that it's not all that common.  Now when I'm talking about perspective, I mean the ability to look at an event or situation without the blinders or blurred lenses of your own biases.  Now, I know most of you are thinking to yourselves, "I have lots of perspective"...yes, yes you do.  The problem with your perspective, is well, it's your perspective.  Your own perspective doesn't really count here, sorry.  What I am talking about is being able to take a specific situation and put on another's shoes, hat, t-shirt or suit and look at it from their point of view.  Too many times we just get mad, upset or offended by what someone says or does and never looks at the world from their view point. 


Now, I am the first person to admit that I am usually critical and tell people they are wrong often, but, I will always try to look at their point of view to figure out why they think a certain way.  Because if I think someone is wrong and I leave it at that, I'm not really helping or learning at all. But if I can help give them some perspective on the situation, ask them questions about why they think a certain way, then I can help understand where they are coming from.  Can I still think they are wrong?  Sure.  But at least I took a brief opportunity to try and understand someone, instead of ignoring them completely.  Because, lets be honest, most arguments we have with one another in sports, religion and politics are usually issues that go deeper than the argument itself.  


Most arguments stem from more foundational beliefs, theories, ideas or opinions, that are rooted much deeper than we really care to recognize.  Lets take a foul in basketball for instance...there are very few other moments in sports where one side will in one voice "boo" or say "what?" at the same time as the other side applauds, agrees and cheers both the referee and the player for drawing the foul.  Talk about perspective!  So the issue in argument is the foul right?  Not really...the underlying issue is that I want my team to win, so whatever way I have to cheer to support my team I will, regardless of whether or not I know a foul was made.  


That might be too simple of an example, but I guess my point is this...we can argue the stuff on the outside all we want, it won't ever change the fact that we disagree.  It takes a lot of work and a lot of time; most of us aren't willing to dig deep into someones life and understand where they are coming from.  I'm not saying that we always have to agree with everyone (not at all) but if we really want to lead by example to the rest of the world, it's going to take a little more work.  If we stop, ask some questions, ask "why" and get to the root of the issue, then we might be able to finally have some perspective...like I said though, it's not that common. 

Get ready for your life to change...

I can remember hearing this phrase countless times once Sara and I found out we were pregnant; "Get ready for your life to change!"  It was always such a general statement and everyone always said it almost in passing, like a "How are you?"..."Good, and you?"  Like the basic response to "We're pregnant" is "Get ready for your life to change."  It seems like such an empty response, no real substance or information.  Now, four months in, our lives have changed a ton, so please don't read this next part and think that I believe my life hasn't changed at all, because it has changed in an amazing way...


I heard this statement again and in my head my response was "Duh"...but then I realized there was a tone in that voice that grabbed me, something that I had noticed before, but didn't connect it until then.  It was the sound of regret.  It's almost as if children became some sort of unwanted burden.  "If it wasn't for my kids, I could have done all of this other stuff..." became what I heard from people when I would hear this phrase again over the course of the next few months before Keagan was born.  There has certainly been change, but I guess I knew that going into it; that was the point.  While it was fun to go out on Saturday night, or whatever, staying at home with Keagan just always sounded better.  I guess my mindset was that while I'm giving up all of this stuff to have a son, what I was getting in return was going to be/is so much better than what I had before...I'm not really sure why you would want to choose the other life.    


I think there are definite seasons in your life, and they all deal with drastic change: graduating from college...getting married...and having kids.  Obviously there are more but I think those three are pretty big.  How well we deal with change has a big impact on our life in a lot of different ways.  What change are you prepared/unprepared for?  Or better yet, what choices are you making that are going to cause change? Are you ready for that change and do you really want that change?

Seriously?

I think I will try to make this a regular "segment" on here as there are a lot of things I see happen around me that make me just go, "Are you freaking kidding me?"  But I think "Seriously?" is a little better and shorter for a title.


Appropriate work-out attire...
Definitely saw a guy running in only spandex tonight while I was on my run.  I realize that might be normal for bikers and football players, but they are also wearing pads, helmets, other equipment and riding a bike.  Also, biking shorts and football pants are all longer than what this guy was wearing.  This guy was neither a football player or a biker if you know what I mean...Now, I know it's 100 degrees outside, and I'm all for trying to deal with the heat as best as you can, but if you're going to be in public at least look in the mirror before you leave and ask yourself, "Should I really be wearing this?"  or "just this" in this specific case.  Now I realize I'm not much to look at when I go running, but I figure I'm not making people cringe as they run by me.  I should have waited till it got darker for my run tonight...


It's just not necessary...
So there are lots of things that we own that we don't really NEED.  I myself have a fair share of unnecessary items in our apartment that we could live without.  However, some times they go too far when they try and sell us something we just don't need.  I am of course talking about the toilet paper commercial whose selling point is, "buy our TP and we will give you a free spare-roll holder!"  What?...a WHAT holder?  Now, my first thought was that this holder actually attached to the dispenser and you now could have a nice decorated/covered roll of toilet paper.  OK...so, I don't go for the cute everything in the bathroom has to match and I even buy the little box that goes over my kleenex so that can match too; I think it's a little over the top, but at least it's consistent; everything matches.  But I was wrong!  All this does is hold the roll of TP!  Why would you need something like that?  I thought everyone just put their extra rolls of TP underneath the sink; but apparently that's the non-normal thing to do.  Besides that, the "holder" was all decorated like it should be out on display; no toilet paper is worth that much and there is too much stuff in peoples bathrooms these days anyway.  We have gone through a lot of Ovaltine in our marriage and I have never once thought, "man, this can would fit a roll of TP perfectly!  Then I could just set it out for everyone to see!"...ridiculous.  If you have to go to the bathroom and you run out of TP and can't reach underneath the sink, it's your own fault, you should just live with the consequences...


Some of you were having trouble leaving comments...I changed it so everyone, even anonymous people, could leave a comment.  If you are getting an endless loop when you log in to leave a comment, it apparently works after you "follow" me :)




Currently listening to "Breathing" by Lifehouse

3 months...

...it's been a blur.  I get confused about which day of the week it is; I think something happened yesterday, when in reality it happened last week.  Basically summer + Keagan = me being confused most of the time. It's been an amazing 3 months though.  Keagan is now more than twice as big as he was when he was born; he is smiling a ton, especially after he eats; he is picking his head up; he has rolled over once and even crawled backwards a little bit; he talks a ton, and by talk I mean sounds come out of his mouth.  We are still working on the crawling part, the laughing part and the sitting up.  But even in the last week he has gotten a lot stronger which is fun; he even started sleeping about 6-7 hours each night, which has been really nice for Sara.  I have been told that some of these things are a big deal, but I pretty much think that every new thing, no matter how small, is pretty neat!  


It was a lot of fun being back in CO.  Keagan got to meet a bunch of family for the first time.  I saw some old friends that I hadn't seen in years and Keagan even got to meet some of my old High School players.  Keagan does great traveling and has now been to Colorado, New Mexico, Nebraska and Iowa; he also gets to go to New York in a few months...quite the little traveler.  


I am looking forward to the next 3 months and watching him grow even more!

Some of you have said that you aren't able to make comments or follow the blog with the links that are here right now.  If you are a blog-expert, please help me out, otherwise I will try to have this fixed so that you guys can comment.    

Memory

Remember the game "Memory"?  Where you had different cards or tiles flipped upside down and you had to find the two that were the same?  The goal was to find the most pairs of cards or pictures that matched; once you found a pair, you always got to go again, that was the real kicker.  I'll admit, I was never good at this game.  I could never remember which picture was where, and usually I would just give away pieces for my friends to find and I would usually be only left with a couple matches, never enough to win.  It's such a simple game, a kids game, one that we probably haven't played since elementary school.


I think that it's a game that we should still be playing as we get older.  Maybe not matching Disney characters on the floor of our living room, but maybe applying the "matching game" to other aspects of our life.  I know I often come up with an idea, thought or belief that I then try to apply to other areas of life and then it doesn't match up.  I'm not so much talking about the "memorizing" as I am the "matching".  So often, when I speak with people, they are flipping over the "Mickey" card and the "Minnie" card, grabbing both and putting it in their pile as if it's a match, but it's not.  It's okay to be wrong, right?  It's just not okay to pretend as if they are the same thing.  The kicker here is that for many of us, we don't understand that there is a difference in the two cards we put into our pile.  Many times we don't even look, we just flip two over and keep them.  The truth is that they don't match up.


I think we all could spend a little more time looking at our tiles instead of just grabbing which ever pieces we feel like matching and then saying "I WIN!"  How often did you and your friends argue about whether you flipped over matching cards or not?  It's pretty obvious if they are or not (and usually we have directions to help us out if it gets confusing).  In life, however, the matching tends to be more complicated.  Spend a few minutes to reflect on your thoughts, ideas and beliefs...ask yourself, do I really believe this?  Why do I think this?  Where did I get this from?  Apply it somewhere else and see if it still holds true.  If it doesn't, then it's not a match and you have to keep looking.

Season of "New"

Sara and I seem to be getting a lot of new stuff recently.  A lot of that has to do with Keagan joining us on April 25th of this year!  So, we had a new baby, which lead to getting lots of new toys, clothes and other assorted baby stuff, which lead to us getting a new mini-van and now, just yesterday actually, we got a new computer.  After being a PC person my whole life, we ended up getting a new iMac and now it seems that the "circle of life" for all our iToys is complete.  Yep, lots of new stuff and it just got me thinking...


Everyday we all have the opportunity to acquire new stuff.  I'm not just talking about material things like clothes and cars, but new situations, new experiences; we get to meet new people everyday, experience new emotions and see, hear and touch new things all the time; recently, I have been really wondering if I am taking full advantage of all the new stuff that happens around me.  As Keagan lays on my chest, sucking on his pacifier and staring at me with his big blue eyes, I think about all the new and amazing experiences he is causing in my life.  Each day brings something new; whether that is him peeing on me while I change his diaper or him having his first laugh (which I think is coming quick).  


Each day brings something new...am I really taking advantage of each day?  Are we really taking advantage of each new day we are given?  Or are we sitting on the sidelines and just watching things happen around us and never experiencing all the things we could be?  Just think, tomorrow morning when you wake up could be your day to experience something new.  Don't go to sleep tomorrow night thinking "Man, I should have..."  Take every opportunity you have and make the best of it.  


"Every New Day" by Five Iron Frenzy is one of my all time favorite songs and worth the 99 cents.  Every day is a gift, use each day you have and treat it as a "new" day instead of just an ordinary one.  


"Only You can make every new day seem so new."